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Title: Riddikulus
Author:
oldtoadwoman
I am of legal drinking age in my region: yupp
Pairing(s)/Characters/Fandom: Jamie Tartt / Roy Kent / Keeley Jones(Ted Lasso fandom)
Challenge/Prompts used: we'll see … Fred & George Weasley✔️, Riddikulus ✔️, Sex Pollen✔️, On Heat/In Heat✔️, Court Jester✔️, Tiptoe Through the Tulips✔️ … some were a stretch like borderline cheating but i think I hit them all
Summary: Jamie doesn't get how fanfic works because he might be too well-adjusted. Roy is not well-ajsted at all. Keely's just won the fukcing lottery.
Rating/Warnings: Will I fall asleep before I manage to type the smut? PRobs, yeah, s o,,, teen-ish?
Word count:this'll be interestin g 2200-ish
Author's Notes (if any): i had to google keeley's name because I was thinking "keelie" and I had NO IDEA what her last name was despite having heard it multiple times.
"What's the sex pollen for>?," Jaime asked, a frown of confusing on his adorable widdle face.
"It's an established trope, " Keeley explained, but she wasn't sure anyone could hear her ove r Roy talking over her.
"It's to make the pretyty boys in the story fuck," Roy explained.
"But what do you need the sex poleln for?" Jaimie repeated. "Why don't they just, yknow, fuck.?"
"It's for when they wouldn't do that without the sex poellen," Keeley said.
"Why would you want to read a story about people who don't walnt to fuck being forced to duck. that's rcreepy.:"
"The important question we've skipped over I think, is when do you have the *time* to read stories about people fucking when you don't even have timet o actually fuck yourself?" Roy asked.
Given eher options, Keely prefered toa ansswer Jamies' question.
Keely', said, "But they *do* want to fuck, like deep down, they're just ashamed to admit it."
Roy growled, deep and throaty in that way that always made Keely a little fluttery in the nether regions so she added hastily, "Because I dont have *time* to fuck properly and you can read a quick fanfic in just a few minutes.
"Why would they be ashamed to fcuk?" Jaimie asked. He appeared to be genuinely confused and KEely was at a loss.
"You know what homophobia is, Jaimie," Ryoy insisted. "You're dad is holmophobic, innit he?"
Keeley couldn't say for certain that Jaimie;'s father was homophic, bu t it would certainly fit what she knew of him.
Jaimie just shrugged. "sure. my dad practically invented toxi c masculinity, so what?"
"So imagine," Roy said, interrupted himself my knocking down a pint, and then started over, "so imagine you grew up actually believing that bullshit but at the same time you kind of fancied blokes."
"what, Like Colin?"
Keeley was still pondering if Jamie meant 'if he fancied bloke the way Colin did' or if he meant "if he fancied blokes who happened to be a bit like Colin," but Roy already affirmed, "Yeah,r ight."
"In that case," Jamie said hesitantly, this whole secretive thing not coming naturally to him,, "maybe I'd keep a bit quiet who I was shagging, but I still wouldn't need any sex pollen or in-heat whatsit." He waved vaguely at Keeleys' phone and sh ewondred how he'd relaized she'd moved on from the sex pollen story to the omegaverse story.
"But like," Roy said, frowning in frustration, "you weren't trying to keep it a *secret* so much as you actually believed you shouldn't?"
"What, not have sex with anybody *eveR* just because me dad was uptight?"
"No, you could still have sex with women," Roy explained, "just you'd have to like supress any of your urges about fellas."
In the meantime, Keeley had waved Mae over and Mae was delivering another round of pints when Jamie finally had his ephipahy, "Oh! You mean like if I was bisexual! like making do with just girls and missing out onthe bloke's side"
"right," Roy said. "So then you get whammied by the sex pollen or the heat or the magic spell or the whatever, right, and then you can shag a man without it being your 'fault'."
Jamie furrowed his brow in a display of concentrated imagination before shrugging. "nah, still don't ge it. "Why fuck I care waht my da thinks. He's an asshole. Like, bonus poiints for pissing him off, yeah?"
"But like, *you* believe it," Roy reiterated. "You got so brainwawashed growing up init that like you believe it so you repress yourself like, and then like sex pollen glittery wooo and you can shag whoever you like yeah?"
Jamie nodded but still seemed unconvinced.
Keeley decded to brave an example, "So imagine you're Fred & George Weasley and you *know* it's wrong, but you really, really, really *want* to and then ::bam:: you're an omega in heat and you just *have* to, right? get it?"
"How am I Fred *and* George?" Jamie asked..
"God damn it, " Roy muttered, "fuuckin lost cause."
But now Keeley was invested so she struggled onward without backup, "so someone casts the Ridikklus hex and ::bam:: you're all in drag in like sexy sexy lingerie tiptoing through the tulips *and* you're in heat *and* there's sex pollen and like you have to fucking FUCK, right? It's *hot*!"
"My god," Jaimie said and, for a moment, Keeley thought she had made ehr point, bt he contnued, "Me dad would be *so* fookin pissed if I dated a man, yeah? Hang on, for an ussie , yeah?"
He scooted over into Roy's side and aimed his phone at themselves. After a few amusing-enough selfies, he prompted, "Come on, man, some tongue for the insta!"
Keeley did a double take at her glass. She hadn't had *That* many pints, surely? But roy obliged Jamie with a little tongue and he snagged a few more hot, hot selfies before Roy went, "what's that for?"
And Jamie explained that he had just posted picture of hiselfa nd Roy french kissing on Instagram for the express purpose of pissing off his father, "No sex pollen necessary, thakn you very much."
Roy GROWLED.
Keeley's stomaach lurched for more than one reason.
"What?" Jaimie asked.
"Delete. It. Now.," Roy demanded.
Jamie shooks his head and shrugged and before Roy punched anyone Keeley said, "It's too late. It's out there. On the internet. FOREVER."
"So?" Jamie said.
Roy continued to growl on a steady simmer.
"Oh, Jamie, you didn't!" Keeley said, knowing full well that he did, because the pics had already shown up in her feed, and fuck they were somehow even hotter than the flesh-and-blood reality in front of her, perhaps because real-life Jamie and Roy wer just sitting there being, in order, confused and grumpy, and Internet!Jamie&Roy llooked likke they might already be fucking.
"Delete. It." Roy repeated.
"You can't post things like that!" Keeley siad.
"What's the big deal?" Jaimie asked, "You're both starting to sound as uptight as my dad. Colin should thank me for taking some of the pressure off."
"This is different!" Keeley screeched. There was already an audible murmur around the bar and Mae had arched an eyebrow in their direction. Word was clearly spreading.
"Why?" Jamie asked, a picture of innocent befuddlement. His dad hadn't even posted an obscenity-laden reply, yet. Keeley realized that he had no idea what he had don.e
"I. Am.Your. Coach," Roy sputtered.
"It's like unprofessional!" Keeley added. "A Conflict of interest! Oh my god, this is as bad as Sam and Rebecca!"
"As if, " Jamie muttered, then did a double take and said, "Wait, Sam and Rebecca for real?"
"No no no no no, but … no … you just … we can fix this … how do we fix this?"
"Oh, shit," Jamie said, the ramifications finally sinking in. "Sorry, man, I was just trying to piss off my dad."
"I could lose my job," Roy said, the growling fading away to resignation, which was, in many ways, more terrifying. "I'm *going* to lose my job."
"We can fix this!" Keeley insisted. She was PR. It was her job to fix this. They could fix this. THey just needed to … "You have to get married!"
Jamie squinted at her, but Roy started nodding.
"What?" Jamie asked.
"Yeah," Roy said, "You have to make an honest man out of me."
Mae delivered another round of drinks that no one asked for. "You're getting married?" Mae asked, hitting the eavesdropping motherlode.
Roy and Keeley nodded while Jamie shook his head.
"Waht difference does that make? Married or not, I'm still a player and you're still one of the coaches."
"Yeah, but *married* player and coach, tha'ts like *romantic*. *shagging* player and coach is just *unseemly.*"
Shandy sort of materialized out of nowhere and volunteered to give either Jamie or Roy or both a blow job on camera if that would help and, upon being turned down, asked if she should go give Colin a blow job. Keeley was very preoccupied with the current problem and only belatedly remembered to shout after Shandy, "ask *Colin* but probably no!"
"How early does the registrar open in the morning?" Roy asked pointing at Keeley's phone because apparently figuring out the logistics was Keeley's job now. Well, given she was the team's official PR consultant, it probably already was her job, but still a 'please' and 'thank you' would not have gone amiss.
"We're still allowed to date other people, yeah?" Jamie asked, looking momentarily concerned.
Roy shrugged. "As long as I get at least one blow-job a week from *somebody* I don't care who else you have on the side."
"Should we hop a train to Gretna Green?" Jamie asked. He belatedly noticed the pint Mae had delivered a few minutes earlier and thus wasn't paying attention when Roy agreed that they needed to buy tickets to Scotland.
"No!" Keeley insisted. "You get married *here* in Richmond. We'll file all the paperwork at the registrar's in the morning and when you make it official, you do it all above board here in Richmond. The whole point is to NOT be scandalous."
Trent Crimm popped up on cue and asked if they had a comment on the wedding rumors.
Roy to ld him to fuck off and Jamie winked and said, “Ask us no questions and we’ll tell you no lies.”
"The point," Keely reiterated, "is to be *open * and above-board with everyone."
Roy grunted. "Alright, you can be the flower girl then."
"Have you set a date?" Trent asked.
"Filing for a certificate first thing in the morning, " Jamie said. "Takes a month after that, I think,."
Keeley worried that was far too much time for everyone involved to sober up and come to theri senses. (Probably the point fof the waitingperiod, admittedly). She was now emotionally invested in this thing happening.
"Will it be a private ceremony or are you inviting your teammates?" Trent wondered.
"Private!" Roy snapped just as Jamie announced "the more the merrier!"
"So a large formal ceremony?" Trent asked Jamie, wisely ignoring Roy altogether.
Jamie nodded happily. "Don't they say something like 'Every bride is a princess on her wedding day'?"
Trent nodded, but he was also clenching his mouth so tightly that it looked like the physical effort of not giggling actually hurt.
" No brides or princess involved as it happens," Roy said. When everyone ignored him, he mumbled "more like a court jester, anyway.."
"YES!!!" Jamie cheered.
Roy squinted at him.
"My dad just replied that we're going to burn in hell. There are more swear words involved if you want to see, but that's the gist of it."
He waved his phone at Roy who had to grab Jamie's hand to hold the phone still enough to read.
Mae delivered more pints announcing they were on the house in honor of the happy couple.
Keeley felt a wave of sadness overtake her. "I cannot believe I'm missing out on this just because of my stupid company taking up so much stupid time."
"Go away now,Trent," Roy announced.
Trent retreated to a discrete distance that was possibly not entirely out of earshot.
"You hear my new hubby," Jamie told Keeley. "I'm allowed to date who I want. No need for you to miss out on anything."
Keeley glanced at Roy who was uncharacteristlcally quiet. He didn't growl or snarl or anything. "Roy?"
"Jamiiie seems to have found a loophole that I cannot argue with," Roy agreed without looking Keeley in the eye.
"Are we un-broken-up then?" Keeley pressed. "Or am I only dating Jamie?"
Roy took a sip from his glass without saying anything.
"What Roy is trying to say is that he regrets breaking up with you because he was stupid and itwasn't really about you being busy with your new job at all so much as his own insecurities so as long as you're getting together with his husband-to-be he wants back in," Jamie translated.
"Roy?"
"Yeah, that," Roy agree quietlty still avoiding eye contact.
"So my question is," Keeley asked leaning in and lowering her voice to omit their attentive audience from the conversation, "is this just for appearances or is there going to be some … um… "
"Now that you mention it, granddad there might need some sex pollen to get up to speed, but you know me, Keeley, I'm game for anything."
"Rule #1," Roy said, "if we're getting married, you never call me 'granddad' again."
"Fair."
Keeley glanced down at her phone where she still had several Harry Potter fanfics bookmarked including a very tantalizing one about Snape and Hagrid and a greenhouse full of nearly ripe sex pollen. It could wait. She slipped the phone back in her pocket.
"So… now that that's all settled, do we need to wait for it to be official or can we all go back to your place and …?"
"Why Jamie's place?" Roy asked. "You and I both have places closer."
"Have you seen Jamie's shower?" Keeley asked.
"I never shower alone," Jamie added by way of explanation. "It's a safety thing."
"Safety in numbers," Keeley agreed.
Roy squinted at them. "You can fit *three people* in Jamie's shower."
Keeley and Jamie both nodded.
"What the fuck are we still doing here then?"
[and then all teh smut happens that I'm too tired to write because somehow it's almost midnight but just imagine so much smut, okay, smut smut smut]
Author:
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png)
I am of legal drinking age in my region: yupp
Pairing(s)/Characters/Fandom: Jamie Tartt / Roy Kent / Keeley Jones(Ted Lasso fandom)
Challenge/Prompts used: we'll see … Fred & George Weasley✔️, Riddikulus ✔️, Sex Pollen✔️, On Heat/In Heat✔️, Court Jester✔️, Tiptoe Through the Tulips✔️ … some were a stretch like borderline cheating but i think I hit them all
Summary: Jamie doesn't get how fanfic works because he might be too well-adjusted. Roy is not well-ajsted at all. Keely's just won the fukcing lottery.
Rating/Warnings: Will I fall asleep before I manage to type the smut? PRobs, yeah, s o,,, teen-ish?
Word count:
Author's Notes (if any): i had to google keeley's name because I was thinking "keelie" and I had NO IDEA what her last name was despite having heard it multiple times.
"What's the sex pollen for>?," Jaime asked, a frown of confusing on his adorable widdle face.
"It's an established trope, " Keeley explained, but she wasn't sure anyone could hear her ove r Roy talking over her.
"It's to make the pretyty boys in the story fuck," Roy explained.
"But what do you need the sex poleln for?" Jaimie repeated. "Why don't they just, yknow, fuck.?"
"It's for when they wouldn't do that without the sex poellen," Keeley said.
"Why would you want to read a story about people who don't walnt to fuck being forced to duck. that's rcreepy.:"
"The important question we've skipped over I think, is when do you have the *time* to read stories about people fucking when you don't even have timet o actually fuck yourself?" Roy asked.
Given eher options, Keely prefered toa ansswer Jamies' question.
Keely', said, "But they *do* want to fuck, like deep down, they're just ashamed to admit it."
Roy growled, deep and throaty in that way that always made Keely a little fluttery in the nether regions so she added hastily, "Because I dont have *time* to fuck properly and you can read a quick fanfic in just a few minutes.
"Why would they be ashamed to fcuk?" Jaimie asked. He appeared to be genuinely confused and KEely was at a loss.
"You know what homophobia is, Jaimie," Ryoy insisted. "You're dad is holmophobic, innit he?"
Keeley couldn't say for certain that Jaimie;'s father was homophic, bu t it would certainly fit what she knew of him.
Jaimie just shrugged. "sure. my dad practically invented toxi c masculinity, so what?"
"So imagine," Roy said, interrupted himself my knocking down a pint, and then started over, "so imagine you grew up actually believing that bullshit but at the same time you kind of fancied blokes."
"what, Like Colin?"
Keeley was still pondering if Jamie meant 'if he fancied bloke the way Colin did' or if he meant "if he fancied blokes who happened to be a bit like Colin," but Roy already affirmed, "Yeah,r ight."
"In that case," Jamie said hesitantly, this whole secretive thing not coming naturally to him,, "maybe I'd keep a bit quiet who I was shagging, but I still wouldn't need any sex pollen or in-heat whatsit." He waved vaguely at Keeleys' phone and sh ewondred how he'd relaized she'd moved on from the sex pollen story to the omegaverse story.
"But like," Roy said, frowning in frustration, "you weren't trying to keep it a *secret* so much as you actually believed you shouldn't?"
"What, not have sex with anybody *eveR* just because me dad was uptight?"
"No, you could still have sex with women," Roy explained, "just you'd have to like supress any of your urges about fellas."
In the meantime, Keeley had waved Mae over and Mae was delivering another round of pints when Jamie finally had his ephipahy, "Oh! You mean like if I was bisexual! like making do with just girls and missing out onthe bloke's side"
"right," Roy said. "So then you get whammied by the sex pollen or the heat or the magic spell or the whatever, right, and then you can shag a man without it being your 'fault'."
Jamie furrowed his brow in a display of concentrated imagination before shrugging. "nah, still don't ge it. "Why fuck I care waht my da thinks. He's an asshole. Like, bonus poiints for pissing him off, yeah?"
"But like, *you* believe it," Roy reiterated. "You got so brainwawashed growing up init that like you believe it so you repress yourself like, and then like sex pollen glittery wooo and you can shag whoever you like yeah?"
Jamie nodded but still seemed unconvinced.
Keeley decded to brave an example, "So imagine you're Fred & George Weasley and you *know* it's wrong, but you really, really, really *want* to and then ::bam:: you're an omega in heat and you just *have* to, right? get it?"
"How am I Fred *and* George?" Jamie asked..
"God damn it, " Roy muttered, "fuuckin lost cause."
But now Keeley was invested so she struggled onward without backup, "so someone casts the Ridikklus hex and ::bam:: you're all in drag in like sexy sexy lingerie tiptoing through the tulips *and* you're in heat *and* there's sex pollen and like you have to fucking FUCK, right? It's *hot*!"
"My god," Jaimie said and, for a moment, Keeley thought she had made ehr point, bt he contnued, "Me dad would be *so* fookin pissed if I dated a man, yeah? Hang on, for an ussie , yeah?"
He scooted over into Roy's side and aimed his phone at themselves. After a few amusing-enough selfies, he prompted, "Come on, man, some tongue for the insta!"
Keeley did a double take at her glass. She hadn't had *That* many pints, surely? But roy obliged Jamie with a little tongue and he snagged a few more hot, hot selfies before Roy went, "what's that for?"
And Jamie explained that he had just posted picture of hiselfa nd Roy french kissing on Instagram for the express purpose of pissing off his father, "No sex pollen necessary, thakn you very much."
Roy GROWLED.
Keeley's stomaach lurched for more than one reason.
"What?" Jaimie asked.
"Delete. It. Now.," Roy demanded.
Jamie shooks his head and shrugged and before Roy punched anyone Keeley said, "It's too late. It's out there. On the internet. FOREVER."
"So?" Jamie said.
Roy continued to growl on a steady simmer.
"Oh, Jamie, you didn't!" Keeley said, knowing full well that he did, because the pics had already shown up in her feed, and fuck they were somehow even hotter than the flesh-and-blood reality in front of her, perhaps because real-life Jamie and Roy wer just sitting there being, in order, confused and grumpy, and Internet!Jamie&Roy llooked likke they might already be fucking.
"Delete. It." Roy repeated.
"You can't post things like that!" Keeley siad.
"What's the big deal?" Jaimie asked, "You're both starting to sound as uptight as my dad. Colin should thank me for taking some of the pressure off."
"This is different!" Keeley screeched. There was already an audible murmur around the bar and Mae had arched an eyebrow in their direction. Word was clearly spreading.
"Why?" Jamie asked, a picture of innocent befuddlement. His dad hadn't even posted an obscenity-laden reply, yet. Keeley realized that he had no idea what he had don.e
"I. Am.Your. Coach," Roy sputtered.
"It's like unprofessional!" Keeley added. "A Conflict of interest! Oh my god, this is as bad as Sam and Rebecca!"
"As if, " Jamie muttered, then did a double take and said, "Wait, Sam and Rebecca for real?"
"No no no no no, but … no … you just … we can fix this … how do we fix this?"
"Oh, shit," Jamie said, the ramifications finally sinking in. "Sorry, man, I was just trying to piss off my dad."
"I could lose my job," Roy said, the growling fading away to resignation, which was, in many ways, more terrifying. "I'm *going* to lose my job."
"We can fix this!" Keeley insisted. She was PR. It was her job to fix this. They could fix this. THey just needed to … "You have to get married!"
Jamie squinted at her, but Roy started nodding.
"What?" Jamie asked.
"Yeah," Roy said, "You have to make an honest man out of me."
Mae delivered another round of drinks that no one asked for. "You're getting married?" Mae asked, hitting the eavesdropping motherlode.
Roy and Keeley nodded while Jamie shook his head.
"Waht difference does that make? Married or not, I'm still a player and you're still one of the coaches."
"Yeah, but *married* player and coach, tha'ts like *romantic*. *shagging* player and coach is just *unseemly.*"
Shandy sort of materialized out of nowhere and volunteered to give either Jamie or Roy or both a blow job on camera if that would help and, upon being turned down, asked if she should go give Colin a blow job. Keeley was very preoccupied with the current problem and only belatedly remembered to shout after Shandy, "ask *Colin* but probably no!"
"How early does the registrar open in the morning?" Roy asked pointing at Keeley's phone because apparently figuring out the logistics was Keeley's job now. Well, given she was the team's official PR consultant, it probably already was her job, but still a 'please' and 'thank you' would not have gone amiss.
"We're still allowed to date other people, yeah?" Jamie asked, looking momentarily concerned.
Roy shrugged. "As long as I get at least one blow-job a week from *somebody* I don't care who else you have on the side."
"Should we hop a train to Gretna Green?" Jamie asked. He belatedly noticed the pint Mae had delivered a few minutes earlier and thus wasn't paying attention when Roy agreed that they needed to buy tickets to Scotland.
"No!" Keeley insisted. "You get married *here* in Richmond. We'll file all the paperwork at the registrar's in the morning and when you make it official, you do it all above board here in Richmond. The whole point is to NOT be scandalous."
Trent Crimm popped up on cue and asked if they had a comment on the wedding rumors.
Roy to ld him to fuck off and Jamie winked and said, “Ask us no questions and we’ll tell you no lies.”
"The point," Keely reiterated, "is to be *open * and above-board with everyone."
Roy grunted. "Alright, you can be the flower girl then."
"Have you set a date?" Trent asked.
"Filing for a certificate first thing in the morning, " Jamie said. "Takes a month after that, I think,."
Keeley worried that was far too much time for everyone involved to sober up and come to theri senses. (Probably the point fof the waitingperiod, admittedly). She was now emotionally invested in this thing happening.
"Will it be a private ceremony or are you inviting your teammates?" Trent wondered.
"Private!" Roy snapped just as Jamie announced "the more the merrier!"
"So a large formal ceremony?" Trent asked Jamie, wisely ignoring Roy altogether.
Jamie nodded happily. "Don't they say something like 'Every bride is a princess on her wedding day'?"
Trent nodded, but he was also clenching his mouth so tightly that it looked like the physical effort of not giggling actually hurt.
" No brides or princess involved as it happens," Roy said. When everyone ignored him, he mumbled "more like a court jester, anyway.."
"YES!!!" Jamie cheered.
Roy squinted at him.
"My dad just replied that we're going to burn in hell. There are more swear words involved if you want to see, but that's the gist of it."
He waved his phone at Roy who had to grab Jamie's hand to hold the phone still enough to read.
Mae delivered more pints announcing they were on the house in honor of the happy couple.
Keeley felt a wave of sadness overtake her. "I cannot believe I'm missing out on this just because of my stupid company taking up so much stupid time."
"Go away now,Trent," Roy announced.
Trent retreated to a discrete distance that was possibly not entirely out of earshot.
"You hear my new hubby," Jamie told Keeley. "I'm allowed to date who I want. No need for you to miss out on anything."
Keeley glanced at Roy who was uncharacteristlcally quiet. He didn't growl or snarl or anything. "Roy?"
"Jamiiie seems to have found a loophole that I cannot argue with," Roy agreed without looking Keeley in the eye.
"Are we un-broken-up then?" Keeley pressed. "Or am I only dating Jamie?"
Roy took a sip from his glass without saying anything.
"What Roy is trying to say is that he regrets breaking up with you because he was stupid and itwasn't really about you being busy with your new job at all so much as his own insecurities so as long as you're getting together with his husband-to-be he wants back in," Jamie translated.
"Roy?"
"Yeah, that," Roy agree quietlty still avoiding eye contact.
"So my question is," Keeley asked leaning in and lowering her voice to omit their attentive audience from the conversation, "is this just for appearances or is there going to be some … um… "
"Now that you mention it, granddad there might need some sex pollen to get up to speed, but you know me, Keeley, I'm game for anything."
"Rule #1," Roy said, "if we're getting married, you never call me 'granddad' again."
"Fair."
Keeley glanced down at her phone where she still had several Harry Potter fanfics bookmarked including a very tantalizing one about Snape and Hagrid and a greenhouse full of nearly ripe sex pollen. It could wait. She slipped the phone back in her pocket.
"So… now that that's all settled, do we need to wait for it to be official or can we all go back to your place and …?"
"Why Jamie's place?" Roy asked. "You and I both have places closer."
"Have you seen Jamie's shower?" Keeley asked.
"I never shower alone," Jamie added by way of explanation. "It's a safety thing."
"Safety in numbers," Keeley agreed.
Roy squinted at them. "You can fit *three people* in Jamie's shower."
Keeley and Jamie both nodded.
"What the fuck are we still doing here then?"
[and then all teh smut happens that I'm too tired to write because somehow it's almost midnight but just imagine so much smut, okay, smut smut smut]
no subject
Date: 2023-04-05 07:21 pm (UTC)[and then all teh smut happens that I'm too tired to write because somehow it's almost midnight but just imagine so much smut, okay, smut smut smut] I relate to this so much LOL.
no subject
Date: 2023-04-06 04:17 pm (UTC)I've never watched this show but I have, much to your surprise I'm sure, read an awful lot of fan fiction and I really enjoyed these conversations. :D
no subject
Date: 2023-04-06 07:45 pm (UTC)I loved the meta-ness of the conversation and how you fit all the prompts and more in there while writing for an entirely different fandom.
Nice one, MA
no subject
Date: 2023-04-07 10:18 pm (UTC)Great FWF, MA!
no subject
Date: 2023-04-08 12:02 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2023-04-10 03:53 am (UTC)You sounded dubious about your prompt use but I thought the way you used the prompts was brill.
I <3 how meta this is with all the convo about fic.
And as for Jamie's dad being "holmophobic"! LOL! Is that fear of Sherlock Holmes?